“Breast Implant Bandit” Sentenced to 6 Months in Jail

This post is actually a follow-up to one I wrote over a year ago about a case of plastic surgery identity theft. At the time, Yvonne Pampellone was wanted by authorities in Orange County, California after she established a fake identity and charged $12,000 worth of plastic surgery (breast augmentation and liposuction) to a bogus line of credit.

In my last post, I was astounded by her audacity and applauded her cunning savvy. Since then, I’ve read countless articles about similar incidents across the world. Apparently, the digital age has made it very easy to steal someone’s identity, and the current economic meltdown has provided many desperate women with a bit more of an incentive to resort to a life of crime to fund their self-beautification. Needless to say, I’m no longer all that impressed by Pampellone’s accomplishments.

But the reason I’ve chosen to follow up on this post is that the 30-year-old “Breast Implant Bandit” has seen her life on the wild side come crashing before her eyes. After a year-long search, authorities, with the help of several irate Orange County plastic surgeons, finally captured Pampellone. They successfully brought her, along with her stolen fake boobs and svelte new figure, to justice.

The Breast Implant Bandit recently pleaded guilty to burglary, grand theft, and identity theft. An Orange County judge sentenced her to six months in jail and three years’ probation. Restitution of an undisclosed amount of money was ordered as well. Apparently, Pampellone doesn’t have deep enough pockets to cover the entire $12K.

I have to admit, I’m a bit disappointed in the outcome of this case. After a year on the run, I was certain Pampellone had absconded with her new silicone jugs and was sipping frou-frou umbrella drinks somewhere on a South American beach. I guess she wasn’t that smart.

Instead, she has to fend off all of the hardened criminals who will covet her cosmetically enhanced body over the next six months. Hopefully, hard-up women behind bars are gentler than their sex-starved male convict counterparts.

I suppose there is a moral to this story. If you are going to commit identity theft for plastic surgery, you’d better swing for the fences. Go all the way – get a facelift along with your other procedures. After all, what’s a few extra thousand dollars on someone else’s tab? That way the authorities won’t be able to recognize you while you’re on the lam. Otherwise, you’ll have to spend your life cave hopping with the bin Ladens of the world, and that wouldn’t be a very good way to show off your hot new body.